Do you know anyone who can't say no and constantly squeeze every thing into every minute of the day? Do you know anyone who says a lot of things they mean and think, but they don't do a whole lot to show it? Do you know someone who says they have their priorities straight, when they obviously don't?
Well, combine those two and you have Rich. I'm definitely a little peeved at him right now for his skewed priorities and his inability to say no.
I'll give yesterday as an example. Rich told me he was going to pick me up at about 5:30-6 for dinner. Great! I was really looking forward to it. He also told me that he was leaving work between 3-3:30 to fight traffic and stop by to visit his daughter for a little bit before he came to pick me up. Ok that's not a problem at all. I was really looking forward to dinner and spending time with him.
3 pm went by. I'm in the middle of a test, won't be able to leave for a little while, he told me. Ok I figured he'd be a little late, 15-20 minutes. I can deal with that. 4 pm goes by, still haven't left, no signs of leaving anytime soon. 5 pm arrives, he still hasn't left and I'm starting to get pissed. He either has to drop seeing his daughter and immediately pick me up (which isn't going to happen) or postpone dinner, which I'm not too happy about, but I at least would be somewhat understanding.
5:30 pm, he finally leaves work. Traffic is horrendous. And he still tries to squeeze everything in. So, instead of a nice relaxing evening, he misses time to spend with his daughter, is grouchy because of it, and I get my time with him squeezed to a bare minimum (with no dinner) and I get to bed late.
Now, if this was a once in a blue moon occurrence, then fine. It happens. But it happens every single week!
His wife made a really good point that I don't think stuck with him. His work is his number one priority. Everything else comes after that. He says it's not, that his family and me are his top priorities, but his actions show otherwise.
To better illustrate this, I'll give you what I see his priorities are:
1. Work
2. Kids
3. Family
4. Me
5. Health
6. Other activites
7. His house
8. Everything else
Now, I'll compare it to mine:
1. School
2. Rich
3. Health
4. Family and friends
5. Work
6. My hiking group
7. Other activities
I know that I need to put my health above all else because if I'm not healthy, I'm not able to do anything else. School comes before everything else, because that is my main focus right now. My work is down pretty low on my list because it's just not as important as the other things. I'm willing to miss work for family/health reasons. Rich is not.
He puts his work before everyone and everything and then touts that it doesn't come first. It's incredibly frustrating to listen to because I see how it effects people. His daughter told him a while back that she feels like Rich missed out on a lot of things because of work. Rich's wife said the same thing. Now, I'm saying the same thing. You think it would occur to him that maybe he shouldn't put work first, but he does.
I'm ranting now and I need to eat lunch, but I just needed to get it out. I've been collecting articles and quotes for him to read that I hope will make something click in his mind that he needs to do more and say less, but right now is not the best time. I guess I just have to wait.
Thanks for reading.
Katy
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