Shifting Directions

Currently, I work in a field that I find somewhat interesting, but was also forced on me. My parents always told me I had to go to college, there was no other option. I had to get a degree in science, math or engineering. Any other major was just not acceptble. I had to get a great job that pays well, and it didn't matter if it would make me happy because at least I would have enough money to pay for everything.

This plan is what I've been on my whole life. I still feel like sometimes I'm on that plan, but there are glimpses, when I realize that this life is my own. I can make my own choices. And so I am making a new choice that is mine and only mine.

I'm going back to school to get a masters in nutritional science.

I've found that I still enjoy the sciences, but my passion is food and people. I have recently taught several cooking classes, and even though they didn't go as planned, I still enjoyed teaching people how to cook. I have discovered that I have a passion for helping people improve their lives, even if it's just for a day, by smiling at them and saying hi. This passion is almost as strong as my passion for food, and the few people I have told about this change have been really supportive and have told me it seems like it would be a better fit for me than where I currently am.

This decision is not without hesitation or fear. I'm afraid that I won't get accepted into the program, mainly because my GPA for my bachelors was not stellar. However, I didn't have the internal motivation I have now. At the time, my only motivation was fear; fear of dissapointing my parents, fear of not getting a good job and having a good life. Fear can be a good motivator, but only so much. I was motivated to scrape by and just barely get a degree. Now, I find I have the motivation to strive for the best I can do. My only fear now is that my motivation will diminish once I start back at school.

I feel much more comfortable about this decision than when I was thinking about pursuing culinary school. With culinary school, I would have had to either go on educational leave of absence for 2 whole years or quit my job entirely. With a masters in nutritional science, I will be able to still work almost full time for 2 years (and only take 1 class each quarter), but I will only have to take 1 year of educational leave of absence. Plus, my company will pay for some of the classes for nutritional science, but wouldn't for culinary school.

I'm still rather afraid to tell my parents, in fear that they won't be supportive. There are so many things going on right now that I don't want to tell them quite yet. I want to do all the research and have it all planned out before I tell them. I think my dad will be supportive since it is something I want to do and will combine my current degree with something I am passionate about. My mom, on the other hand, won't be that supportive since I am in a good, stable job right now that gives me a rather large paycheck, which is all she cared about me having.

I don't enjoy my job, it doesn't challenge me. I need something that will feel fulfilling, even if it doesn't pay as much. The positive side is that at any time while I'm pursuing this new degree, I can back out and keep the current job I have. If it turns out I don't like nutritional sciences, I can always come back to where I'm at. If I can't get a job in nutritional sciences, then I can always stay where I am at.

There are definitely a few details I need to work out and sort through, and it is going to require me pulling on my big girl pants and stepping outside my comfort zone, but I think in the end it will be worth it.

The great part is that I can already see an end goal. I may have to work at a gym or find multiple jobs at first working for other people, but eventually I want to have my own business where I coach people on eating healthy, especially for those who have food allergies, like I do. I would love to be able to work part-time as an RD while also teaching cooking classes. That would be the perfect job for me.

So, here's to following my dreams!

Thanks for reading...